Back to the start

Well, I have now been home from paradise for two weeks...and those two weeks have been extremely challenging. Being thrown back into work with no time to rest was horrific. We got a new system at work that has been full of bugs, making everyday simple tasks MUCH harder to accomplish. The fact that I have been given more job responsibilities on top of that has been almost more than I can handle. I wake up every morning feeling anxious, knowing that I have to work and feel such stress for 8 full hours. It hardly seems worth it. And just when I think I can't take anymore, I get in trouble for having a bad attitude. The emotional dam burst. I just don't feel like anyone understands how much pressure I am feeling, how hard this transition is, and how it's not just work that is weighing me down... However, since my meltdown, things have improved slightly. I am working on my attitude and feeling hopeful that things will get better.

It's not just work...it's life too. I still don't have a roommate, so finances are kicking me in the panties. It is scary, but somehow these small little miracles have happened this last week and I have found money to pay my bills. Whether it be getting a random check in the mail from a cardiologist that I went to 2 years ago, who audited my account and realized they had overcharged me, or from my sweet mother who paid me back for something I purchased for her and slipped in a little bit more. And let's not forget the tax refund that will be coming soon... Things are working out and I truly believe the Lord is blessing me for having the faith to pay my tithing.

Life is rough sometimes. But I am happy to say that things will be getting better, because I am ready to take the steps necessary to make them so. I am starting over. Back to the resolutions I made in January...that only lasted a few days. Back on the diet that is miraculous and makes me feel happy about myself. More aggressive roommate hunts. More activity in church. Making better choices and forgiving myself for the mistakes I have made. It's a new beginning. And I embrace it.

So this week I vow to:
*go to the gym faithfully at 5am every morning
*eat meat and vegetables, and believe that I love it
*clean my room and get more organized
*find what I did with all my tax paperwork
*go to work with a smile on my face
*not grunt when my computer freezes and I get an error message pop up
*figure out how to attract potential roomies
*find a way to serve someone else in need

Oh, and I will also start working on those free gifts I promised a while ago. Any advice for what a man would like? I don't think he would like a scrapbooked picture frame...

{Have a great week}